30 September 2011

i can't stop looking at the place i live.

sun sitting down

to the porch

shivers

the back of the doghouse we don't use

some weird trash left by former tenants



Bierce, by the kiddler

my kid is a photography master

taken by my kid; he takes a lot of pictures of torsos

another by the kid from the roof of the storm shelter
I know a lot of people don't dream about living in a single wide in the middle of nowhere. I know a lot of people would probably like it, too. I'm a little surprised by how good it feels to live here. Every moment I'm in this place, breathing this air that smells like cut hay and wet dirt, I feel overwhelmed in a happy way. In the city, I was overwhelmed by anxiety and I feel trapped behind closed blinds. Here, I don't feel trapped, even though I admit I'm intentionally isolated. While maybe it isn't ideal that being in a moderately populated area makes me feel crazier than a shithouse rat, I'm glad and grateful to have found a place that makes me feel like some kind of regular, happy rat.

Though, honestly, I feel pretty scared, too. Scared that it'll be taken away, that we won't be able to stay, that it's just a tease and everything will fall apart. So I breathe easy, but I'm still holding my breath.

4 comments:

  1. you're always welcome lady! ;3

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  2. it looks so beautiful and peaceful! i could see myself getting into a slice of that, now that i'm getting used to rural isolation.

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  3. it's really the best place i've lived in my entire life.

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